Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda

I had many hours before and after my flight out of New York to write and post some of what I wanted to share about my experience in NYC, fandom/Armitage related, and other, especially the cross-over of my Armitage experience with my RL friends, and how I did with my NY bucket list. Woulda, coulda, shoulda, because . . .

I just can’t right now. I left New York City at 2 a.m. on Election Day, and arrived in Guadalajara just about when the polls opened on the east coast. I was too tired to make it to the site where our Democrats Abroad was having an election returns gathering. I found PBS News Hour on You Tube, streaming live, and that was enough.

I wept openly during Hillary Clinton’s 11 minute statement today. I’ve been with Hillary since Bill Clinton’s first presidential campaign. I’m taking it hard, for her, for me, for us, and for many of the fools who didn’t vote for her, because they’r going to pay a high price. Some of those very people -they’re going to be thinking woulda, coulda, shoulda.

Living out of country doesn’t make it any better; Mexico is taking it hard, too. Difficult to tell what the impact will be here living as an ex-pat.

Women are not valued by too many in my country. Professional women are especially not valued by too many. Sexism, sexual assault, harassment, misogyny are forgivable or forgettable by too many in my country.

It’s okay, and even makes you electable as President of the United States, to incite open, vocal, relished hatred in my country.

I have no words of encouragement.  The Supreme Court is the most vulnerable and the impact of conservative Trump appointees could do harm for decades.

I want to say a word to my friends, who will never read this, but anyway, of whom I am so proud – who went across the country as lawyers to poll watch in other states, to those who contributed time and money, who canvassed, who worked phone banks, who fundraised, to those friends, who here in Mexico became politically active and helped get out the absentee vote and also canvassed and helped register Mexican Americans to register and vote.  Most of you, like Hillary, have been in some sort of public service and/or have been politically active for the right causes most of your professional lives – and now this?  I am so proud to call you friends.

I don’t think Richard Armitage can help me right now.

Or John Lennon, for that matter. I had occasion to visit Strawberry Fields in Central Park with fellow Armitage fans. This is the memorial to John Lennon:


It says Imagine.

But when the unimaginable happens?





7 thoughts on “Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda

  1. 48 hours later I have nothing but grief and fear in my soul. Even at the worst of times in my life I’ve always felt I had options. Now I feel trapped and alone in a country whose contours I don’t recognize, where certain things that were tolerable are now likely to become intolerable and I will be unable to do anything about them. It takes so long to build things up, but they can be destroyed in a very short period. We are going to regret this like nothing we have regretted in our lives. And the misogynism part — I can’t cope.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I don’t know what to say Perry. I wish i could hug you and cry with you. There has been so much of that already this summer. The certainty that things will not be better, only worse, the frustration of not being able to do anything about it. And being reminded of it day after day after day.
    I thought of the supreme court too, probably because it’s been a topical subject here too.
    My only hope is that as progress has been made in the past, Obama was elected and so on this too needs to eventually pass. I too fear for the damage done in the meanwhile and i can only hope that we can do something about limiting it. It’s not just the US, Europe is also unrecognisable these days and seems to be getting worse.
    It’s a grieving process i think, this is how it feels. So all i can say is that you are definitely not alone, in fact not at all. Yes they won, this time… but nearly half of those who at least spoke up didn’t want this, so many don’t and never will. Once we’ve managed to catch our breath somehow i hope we’ll find the energy to keep going, to speak up, to do stuff. Because i have a feeling more than ever it will be needed.

    Liked by 1 person

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