Why Aren’t’ You Married?

Because I can’t stand living with anyone for more than two days.

Because I’m too busy.

Because nobody wants me.

Because I don’t want anybody.

Because I’ve never met the right person at the right time.

Because no one is good enough.

Because I’m not good enough.

Because I snore.

Because I can’t stand snoring.

Because I’m a psychopath.

Because I’m afraid I’ll marry a psychopath.

Because no one is as perfect as my father.

Because I hated my father.

Because I want to spite my mother.

Because I don’t want to end up like my mother.

Because I fart in bed.

Because everyone I’ve been with farts in bed.

Because I’m a slob.

Because I’m afraid I will marry a slob.

Because I fear commitment.

Because I’m afraid I’ll find someone better and it’ll be too late.

Because I’m afraid my spouse will find someone better and leave me.

Because I’m attracted to the wrong type.

Because I’m the wrong type.

Because I can’t trust anyone.

Because no one trusts me.

Because I would miss answering the question, “What aren’t you married.”

But, why aren’t you married?

I don’t know.












41 thoughts on “Why Aren’t’ You Married?

  1. ahahaha…..oh I laughed and laughed. So funny. I think he has actually used a couple of those in some interviews. Lol.


  2. He should carry your list of responses with him at all times and whip it out of his pocket, give one of them as an answer and pointedly tick it off the list in front of the journalist. That would be funny, especially if it was a filmed interview.


  3. Love all your responses!!! My husband and I “dated” 13 years before we married 15 years ago. Personally, I liked my independence and maybe that is why we have been together so long. We respect and understand that each needs their own personal space, while at the same time we need to be together to raise our son. While cutting my husband’s hair tonight, I commented to him he has the same “crinkle’s” that RA does. I told him about the recent interview and some of the questions that were asked. I brought up the comment about why he wasn’t married at 42. My husband’s response, Why is it her business?? LOL


  4. I didn’t marry until I was 43 for a lot of those reasons plus the fact I put my career first. I got to where I wanted in my career and then I was fortunate enough to find someone to love. You marry when you’re ready, and sometimes you’re never ready. Enjoy life and live it!


    • Beautiful, Tamara…. for most single people that love me well enough to make me privy to their thoughts, timing is almost everything. And what’s wrong with enjoying life as yourself, a “whole person”, without feeling you can’t live without the “other” – or trying to, if that’s where you are? I’m not sure that, if something happened to my DH, I could bear the thought of entering the “dating wheel”, gerbil-like, again – for many of Perry’s listed reasons. Thanks for sharing.


  5. Perry, this is wonderful, I love it. Let’s see, how many different groups of people did this woman manage to offend? Single people, overweight people (especially women), RA fans as a whole (“ignorant”) block…. I’m sure there are more!

    I’m convinced that RA decided early on in the interview that he was not going to give her much, since he is pretty good at reading and reflecting back from interviewers. So she got mad and decided to state “he doesn’t know why” this and that, in an effort to try to make it sound like his problem instead of hers (that she didn’t do a good job). I already mentioned on Serv’s page that I think his “I hate laziness” comment might have hit home with her, and that may have been his partial intent. He still made some great comments in this interview. Thanks again for this post.


    • I have to read it again and consider the “hate laziness” comment in light of your thinking. What can’t be discerned from this article, is how much he said right there in response to a question from Gold, or what she culled from other interviews. It is not that easy to tell, except as to the Crucible quotes.
      For ex- The Vicar – he may .have not said a word about. I doubt she called ITS schlock in front of him. so this can be edited and/or she could have culled thoughts from other places.
      Which is, I think , lazy.


      • Oh, I think clearly some of her bigger zingers were not said directly to him…. I doubt she’d have had the nerve. I looked back at the article too, and notice this time how few actual quotes from him appear on the 1st page…. really, only the naked dream. (And how in Hades did that come up in conversation, I have to wonder??) So you are probably right, most things she (mostly disparagingly) mentions on that page may not have even been discussed with him, including VOD, ITS, Barry Manilow and the fandom.

        It also seems atypical to see flatly stated he “does not know why” he became an actor (really? that story wouldn’t be that hard to find) and “does not know why” he’s not married. Seems “closed” to me, compared to his usual more gracious style. He did give her the great stuff about his own “propensity to be lazy and lie about it.” And fear making him rageful. (And some of this really seems Proctorish, too, doesn’t it?) He apparently decided he wanted to give her more about the Crucible, the ostensible reason she was there. Once again, I am so spoiled to video interviews and wish we could be fly on the wall to see video of this.


        • We just can’t tell how the conversation actually went. Naked Dream? He’s mentioned it before, so she could have said something like, I”ve read in your interviews like that many of us, you have the naked dream – are you having it now? Or something – because she approached it as though she and the rest of us are familiar with his naked dream.


          • Huh, I don’t remember hearing about it before….. one more thing I actually learned from the article so I guess not a “total” loss (maybe just a “net” loss πŸ™‚ …. I may try not to read the thing again today for a little perspective.


  6. I’ve been a lurker here for a while (and I really enjoy reading this blog :)), and I just had to add my two cents worth.

    I’m also 42, I’ve been on my own with three kids for 12 1/2 years, and if there’s one thing I get really tired of, is having people ask me if I’ve ‘found’ someone. I’m trying to show my kids (especially my daughter who’s 12), is that as a person you DO NOT need to be with someone for the sake of being with someone, or, more importantly, to complete yourself. It’s hard enough discovering who you are and raising kids. Trying to teach your kids that they are okay exactly as they are and that they don’t ‘need’ a partner is getting very hard when society deems that there is something wrong and sad if you are single. Some of us prefer to focus on what is important to us at the time – be it a career or, in my case, my kids. They were (are) too important to me to stuff up their lives because I wanted (or needed) to ‘have’ someone in my life. If someone is completely happy within themselves, who is anyone else to tell us there’s something wrong with us because we are still single at 42?! I may be ‘middle-aged’ (huh – don’t feel like it!), but there is still the rest of my life to find someone – if that’s what is meant to be.

    I’ll get off my soap box now πŸ™‚


    • Welcome Jemma. You stay on your soapbox as long as you like and for as many visits as you like. There are some people, especially women ( and maybe they’re finally dying off – I know they have in my family) who will never understand how a woman could prefer to be single rather than settle – or, settling aside, just would rather be alone. (Not married). I could tell you some stories that would make your hair stand on end of men friends and family tried to talk me into. In some cases, all the men had going for them was that – well – they were single men.


    • Jemma, I admire your focus on putting your kids first and finding happiness within rather than “just finding someone”. What a depressing concept! πŸ™‚ Your attitude is refreshing to me. Cheers and blessings to you and your family!


  7. I constantly get the same question, even from strangers. Someone asked me that today, a relative I don’t talk to often. I’m older than Richard. I’m tired of it too. I know it will never stop. I’m sure that’s what I’ll be asked when I get to heaven, or hell. I have no answer that will satisfy anyone. I don’t know why I’m not married.


  8. I’m extremely happily separated after a very long marriage. I think my answer when people start asking me why I haven’t remarried, or found a replacement is going to be ‘because I’m a pathetic loser and no one loves me’. I think that will shut them up real fast. Any maybe make them think why they would ask such a stupid question in the first place.


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